Update

I had my second round of post-op appointments today-- here are some reflections:

• No matter how imaginative or strong-willed I fancy myself to be, a few pints of barium sulfate suspension simply doesn't go down like a few pints of Guinness or peach iced tea.
• I didn't eat breakfast today, and because my appointments were jumbled and postponed, I spent 6 hours of my day with nothing in my system except a few pints of barium sulfate suspension and some intravenous iodine. I don't recommend spending any length of time like this.
• The CT technician told me that when she administered the iodine (used as a dye for imaging), I'd feel a wave of heat, a metallic taste in my mouth, and the false sensation of urinating. I giggled at this, and then immediately ate shit for it, because she was spot on. I am now wildly curious as to just how an injection of iodine gives the false sensation of urinating because I could see it becoming a fun aspect of some practical jokes should I ever become a medical professional.
• My scans were clear, strengthening the hypothesis that my tumor was sporadic, not genetic, and that I do not have Von Hippel-Lindau disease. So far, so good.
• When my oncologist was showing the series of images from my scans, he was sort of narrating-- "Here are the lungs, and there's your heart-- liver, that's your stomach there on the right...", etc." and when he got to the lower part of my digestive tract, he felt the need to point out the contents of my large intestine. Thanks, Bob, because my mom and I couldn't determine what that substance was!
• A few pints of barium sulfate suspension [oh, did I mention it was "citrus" flavored?!] does NOT sit well. Imagine letting maybe a dozen sugar-free Orange Creamsicles melt, and then mixing it with a shit-ton of chalk (like the stuff gymnasts put on their hands before doing a vault), and then letting it go bad...and you're close to the level of vomit-inducement I was enduring earlier. It was, however, served chilled.
  
• My neurosurgeon gave me the go-ahead to start driving and to go back to work as soon as it's comfortable. I am, however, still not allowed to resume my Australian-rules football hobby.

And that's about it. More soon.